My client looked at for me a long time across the table in Starbucks and said, “I can negotiate for others, but not for myself, she said. For whatever reason, talking about money really stresses me out.”

This surprised me a great deal. Competent woman, educated and an admirable career path. Certainly well accomplished and in a sales role to boot!

“Why is that?” I asked.

“Because nice girls don’t ask.”

“Don’t ask. Don’t get.  Male or female – money is not about luck. It’s about planning. In fact, raises and promotions are more about knowing your worth and being able to state it.” I responded.

My client is certainly not alone in her feelings or thoughts. Many women feel this way. I’ve known entrepreneurs who can’t ask for the cash. Some believe if they work hard, it will be earned and offered to them. This strategy often leaves women feeling confused, followed by bitter.

It’s not your boss’s job to hand out dollar bills. It is their job to monitor your progress and keep you focused on their goals. Thinking you deserve something and waiting isn’t a strategy.

The next time you are looking for a raise or moving to a new job, try these three tactics:

1) Educate yourself. Know your worth. Research your title. Look at job postings. What do they pay for this job? What are you being paid?

2) Decide what you want to make. Do you want to make 10% more? Why? Did your skill set grow?

3) Consider your boss has a limited amount of budget. Know that if you go into your bosses office with a business case outlining what you do and why you are requesting more, chances are you’ll get it.

Money has nothing to do with emotions, nor does it have a work/reward tie. Money has no power in itself The only power it has is what you assign to it. Ask any number of people and you will find they all have different ideas about money and how it should be used.

Perhaps re frame how you think about money and stop worrying about it completely. After all, it’s already been printed!

All we are trying to accomplish is getting more into your wallet.

I think Shivaun Palmer, of Plaid For Women really hit home when she asked me about not only women – but people in general and asking for more money at work. In this interview, we also talk about how men look at money and getting  raise vastly different than a woman does in her profession.

http://www.plaidforwomen.com/video-post/elizabeth-lions-women-money/

Bottom line: Don’t ask. Don’t get.

Bio:

Elizabeth Lions is the author of two business books entitled “Recession Proof Yourself” and ” I Quit! Working For You Isn’t Working For Me.” , with a third book on the way on leadership. She is an author, coach and speaker for some of the largest high tech companies in the United States. She also has the privilege of teaching and developing leaders in the Middle East and Europe. 

In fact, she has the best job in the whole wide world. 

“Work” isn’t work to Elizabeth. 

For more about her philosophies, please visitwww.elizabethlions.com