#40 – REKINDLE YOUR VOCATIONAL ROMANCE – DR. TRUDY

Dr. TrudyThere was an old Chinese saying, “the biggest fear in a man’s life is choosing the wrong profession; the biggest fear in a woman’s life is choosing the wrong husband.”

In the old days in the West or the East, women were deprived the opportunity of receiving education and job opportunities.  With the high divorce rate in modern societies, women’s career choices are no longer limited by choosing a spouse.  Under extremely demanding global economy and competition, both men and women are subject to tremendous demands for productivity, performance, and preeminent innovation in the workplace. 

In today’s global labor market, there is a trend for high quality yields, high productivity and high performance matched with much lower costs, especially for labor-intensive manufacturing industries.  Preeminent innovation and constant change seem to be the key to winning the global economic game.

Nowadays, I believe the biggest fear in modern man and woman’s life is how to cope with vocational depression and rekindle vocational romance.  Let me explain:

SEVEN YEAR ITCH TO TWO YEARS AND NINE MONTHS
In Western fairy tales, the prince and princess do not worry about choosing the wrong profession or the wrong spouse.  They always end up living ‘happily ever after.’   After the birth of children, among the chaos of bottles, diapers, and sleepless nights, the prince and princess still have to face the stress of high productivity and performance at work and at home.

Marital infidelity usually followed a ‘Seven Year Itch’ cycle.  Women found shelter in depression and men recharged low spirits through substance abuse or one or both sough extramarital affairs.   With the help of modern social media, people may also find solace through virtual romance.

From my practice, I’ve seen relationship stresses shorten the infidelity lifecycle from the ‘Seven Year Itch’ to two years and nine months.  After repetitive daily work routines and struggles, who has the energy or creativity for ordinary change and maintenance of a relationship, not to mention preeminent innovation in the workplace?  It’s very hard to do.

Romance easily and quickly disappears through necessary daily routines.  I’m finding that the short-lived honeymoon period is too quickly replaced by disillusion and depression.  The definition and typical image of depression tend to describe a sad and weeping female with low self-esteem along with the suggestion that the cause is likely to be biological and chemical unbalance.  But, this easy explanation does not fit into the prototypical vocational depression that many men and women today suffer.  They often suffer silently without awareness or a proper understanding of what’s occurring.

The high-tech industry is especially vulnerable.  It has created a magical whirlwind of fascinating gadgets that cast a magic spell upon consumers and investors.  The success of high-tech industry is built upon high speed innovation by highly intelligent professionals.  As a result, cognitive capacities in charge of creating, reinventing, and refreshing gradually become dull and depleted within a few months.

HOW TO REKINDLE YOUR ROMANCE
Invocation and incantation are methods to call upon for inspiration, insight, and intuitive revelation.  Ancient muse or mystical inspiring creatures have always manifested through  aesthetic luminary images which are the epiphany of life-giving creation.  OK, what does this mean?

Romance ignites intense interest (passion) and fuels vigorous vitality and vivacity which enhance excitement and euphoria.  Creative minds need a high dosage of stimulation to sustain their innovation.  From I’ve seen in my practice with professionals, vocational depression with the symptoms of dullness, stagnation and apathy are epidemic and the worst fear of innovative professionals.  Hence the importance of Valentine’s Day to regroup, reinspire, and rekindle your relationship.

VALENTINE’S DAY IS AN HR ISSUE!
Selecting a company or hiring an employee is a decision involving high risk and high investment for both employee and employer.  High turnover rates, low morale, low energy, low productivity are costly to all businesses.  Vocational depression caused by stress, fatigue, work mismatch, mismanagement, or lack of fulfillment are not easily detected or addressed in many companies.

Many companies are also global.  When the workforce is becoming globally diverse, vocational depression can be triggered by complicated factors that can’t be easily detected, such as cultural issues, conflicting goals, lack of rewards, few incentives, differing values, expectation differences, time zone coordination, lack of verbal and nonverbal communication just to name a few.

So, take a look at the attached Vocational Depression Assessment tool and see if your aspiration and aptitude for positive change has been stifled and is in need of a revival.

Valentine Day may come in various forms or shapes.  If you have a significant other, spend a weekend at your favorite getaway.  You may want to make it private getaway and develop a mental picture that relaxes and re-energizes you.

HAPPY VALENTINE’S DAY
In any case, Valentine’s Day is just around the corner.  Your invocation might be granted and serendipity may befall upon you to rekindle your desire for a romantic vocational breakthrough.

Happy Valentine’s Day!

VOCATONAL DEPRESSION ASSESSMENT

  • Have you ever felt listless when you think about your work?
  • Have you ever felt overwhelmed by the to-do-list at work?
  • Have you ever felt restless in catching up new knowledge and new innovation?
  • Have you experienced mental fog and wish to escape?
  • Have you ever felt trapped by your job?
  • Have you doubted about your self-worth and the value of your job?
  • Have you felt insecure about your job security?
  • Do you feel anxious about the possibility of being layoff?
  • Do you feel unimportant or invisible at your workplace?
  • Do you feel bored (or lack of interest) in what you used to be good at?
  • Do you feel powerless to make an impact?
  • Do you feel exhausted for several days in a roll, even with good quality sleep?
  • Do you think that you are wasting your life to exchange for a paycheck?
  • Do you feel unappreciated by your supervisors/managers/co-workers?
  • Do you experience frustration in dealing with your supervisors/managers/co-workers?
  • Do you think that there is no career path or career future/promotion for you?
  • Do you think that there is no challenge, no stimulation, or no inspiration at work?
  • Do you think that you are a square peg in a round hole?
  • Do you feel stuck in a rut?
  • Do you think that your strengths and talents are not fully utilized?
  • Will you quit your job even if it means your income would be 50% less?

Bio:

Dr. Trudy Hu has been a clinical psychologist, an innovative program director, and a renowned speaker for more than 20 years in Texas, Oregon and soon in California.  She has played a leadership role in high-tech non-profit organizations, CASPA-Austin (1998-2000), CASPA-Portland, OR (2003-2009), Cascade Professional Association (CASPA, 2009-2013).  She was a recipient of Outstanding Minority Student Award in University of Florida (1986-1988), Outstanding Research Grant in University of Illinois (1988-1992), Outstanding Overseas Chinese Leadership Award in Midwest (1992), and graduated from National Taiwan University as a Foreign Languages and Literature major with 4-year Scholarship.

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